#MyHairDon'tCare

Long time no see friends. 

Let's just get something out in the open - I have newly acquired dreadlocks. 

I know that not everyone will like them. Not everyone will think I made a good decision.  

So, let's get down to WHY I chose dreadlocks. 

I have loved how dreadlocks have looked for ages. I've always wanted them, but never thought I'd look good with them and I fell subject to believing the lies of how they're dirty and no one will accept me. 

Over the past month or so, Jesus has started talking to me about caring too much about other's opinions. 

Far too often I am controlled by other's opinions about what I do, who I am and how I look. If you were unaware of this aspect of my thought process, don't feel left out. I've become a pro at portraying confidence and a certain attitude of "I don't give a crap what you think about me!" I've trained myself not to let people know I care, because I trained myself that sensitivity and having feelings were both negative character traits. 

I'm good at being the first one to break the box, be weird, act awkwardly, speak out, laugh loudly and getting other people to be "proud of their weird" as I tend to think. I hate seeing people bound by what is "cool" when there is so much unique creativity and personality they have to let loose. All the while, I sit there and think about how my loud laugh bothers people, How my stories are annoying,  How I didn't dress appropriately for the outing, etc. I've watched myself care far too much about what people think of me. I'm done.

After years of straightening, I finally decided over the past 3 years to let my hair go naturally curly again. People loved it. My nice curly hair became the one thing I could count on making me pleasant and acceptable to people. My permanent acceptance letter to any social occasion or group of people. Pathetic, Right? 

Well, Jesus started talking to me about my hair. He said "Does it really matter?" No, of course it doesn't REALLY matter, in the Kingdom perspective of life. "Do you really think you'll be turned away?" A little bit. 

"Jackie, Get dreadlocks. I want to see you not care about any opinion but mine!" But that's terrifying. 

"You use that word too much." ... "You like dreads, you should get them. Who cares what they'll say!" 

So, I made the plan, I watched endless hours of tutorials, maintenance and care videos. I made one of my roommates watch a bunch too. So I set the date. 

This past Monday and Tuesday night we worked on them for hours! They're frizzy and new, but I love them already. I'm excited for the adventure that is before me. 

And just to be trendy. #dreadhairdontcare 

Yep.